


freedom is being alone [i fear liberation]

by eavis, foundfamilyvevo



Series: straight for your heart (wolfpack au) [9]
Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Werewolf, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Gen, Hugs, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Sexual Harassment, the other boys are there just more offscreen this fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-29
Updated: 2016-12-29
Packaged: 2018-09-13 02:35:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,501
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9102691
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/eavis/pseuds/eavis, https://archiveofourown.org/users/foundfamilyvevo/pseuds/foundfamilyvevo
Summary: It’s been nearly a fortnight of Eric staying over ‘just ‘til I get back on my feet, yeah Tommo?’ and nearly as long of him coming in late with alcohol on his breath, just a little too careful with his consonants when he talks.[louis has a friend staying over, and liam gets caught in the middle.]





	

**Author's Note:**

> this comes before 'Rather Have Broken Bones' chronologically, but it's not that important to read them in order.
> 
> heads up this fic does deal with consent issues and brief non-explicit sexual harassment, mostly verbal. if this is a sensitive thing for you please feel free to skip to the end for more detailed notes or skip this fic entirely. stay safe!!!

It’s been nearly a fortnight of Eric staying over ‘just ‘til I get back on my feet, yeah Tommo?’ and nearly as long of him coming in late with alcohol on his breath, just a little too careful with his consonants when he talks.

And he talks. A lot. Mostly to Liam, and it’s- - nothing he says is mean, exactly, not like - they’re compliments, sort of. Liam isn’t too sure on that point, because they don’t make him feel warm and safe inside like he does when one of the boys is complimenting him. They make him feel sick and like he used to around his old - around some of the other packs. Part of that might be the alcohol, though. Zayn and Louis don’t drink anymore. Louis hasn’t, Harry told him, since the night Louis came home after a night out with the lads and Niall had nightmares every night for weeks and weeks, and Zayn never drank very much anyway, so it wasn’t that big a deal for him either, apparently. Harry admits, looking a little ashamed, that he missed it sometimes - a nice glass of wine or sommat - but he and Niall had a good talk about it a while back, and now he’ll sometimes have a glass or two while he’s out with Nick’s lot, but he’s careful to shower and brush his teeth really well before he comes home.

Liam almost started crying the first time he’d realised he wouldn’t have to worry about any of them stumbling in drunk at three in the morning, yelling and cursing and demanding to know who had gotten into his things even though Liam hadn’t - anyway. It was just - nice. Not to have to worry about it, is all. And now there’s Eric, and it’s fine, obviously, he’s Louis’ friend, but it’s hard on Niall, even if Liam can deal with it.

And he is! It’s fine, it’s just. Easier to pick up a few extra shifts or go out with Jade and Leigh-Anne to see a film when they ask him, when before he’d always turn them down politely. Eric can’t stay forever, after all. It’s just for another couple of days.

He gets back from a run one night after work and Eric’s there on the couch watching some knock-off Top Gear on the telly, and Liam raises a hand in a half-hearted wave. Maybe he can make it upstairs without any -

“Lookin’ good, Leeyum,” Eric says, beer raised halfway to his lips as he looks Liam up and down. “Gotta keep fit, yeah? Bet you don’t have any trouble pulling. Blokes and birds fallin’ over themselves to touch, I bet.”

“I - like to run,” Liam says, feeling that cold flush wash over him that he always gets whenever Eric - compliments him.

Eric grins at him, lazy, and takes a sip of his beer. “C’mon, then, have a seat. Want a beer? Think I’ve got one left somewhere around here.”

“Oh, no, that’s - I don’t - I was just going to have a shower, thanks.”

“Oh yeah?” Eric winks. “Want some company?”

Liam freezes, horrified. Surely Eric isn’t - “No, I’m - I’ve got to -“ he stammers incoherently and flees. He double checks that the bathroom door is locked, even though they don’t usually bother.

He’s up even earlier the next day, nabs the shower before anyone else can; checks the lock again. The doorknob rattles five minutes into his shower and he freezes, heart thumping so loudly he thinks he can hear it over the water running, but then Louis’ voice comes grumping through the door, “Who’s gone and locked the door? Harry, if you’re taking one of your five hour baths, you could at least leave it open for a bloke to clean his teeth.”

“I - it’s me, Lou, I’m sorry. I’ll be out in a sec!” Liam calls and rushes through the rest of his shower, nearly smashing his head on the side of the sink in his haste to pull his clothes on over his scantily dried self. Louis gives him a funny look when he opens the door, looking from his own boxer pants and one of Niall’s band tees to Liam’s button up and jeans. “Sorry, didn’t realise we were dressing up to piss,” is his only comment. Liam flushes hard and turns away, and Louis frowns a little, voice gentle. “Hey, Payno, sorry, I didn’t mean to - you look nice, of course, I was just making fun.”

Liam forces himself to smile, not to flinch at the compliment. “Right, yeah, sorry. Just feel bad I took so long.”

Louis eyes him a moment longer, then smiles, leaning in for a nipple twist. “Well, obviously,” he says, tone light. “Away with you then, I’m sure Niall wouldn’t mind a hand with brekkers.”

Work is terrible. He has to put one of his favourite students in time out for stealing another little one’s toy, even though she protests tearfully that she only did it because “he stole from Ellie, Mister Liam! No one’s allowed to steal from Ellie!” Then Will laughs at her for being in time out and Ellie punches him, so then they’re  _ both _ in time out, because people shouldn’t hit other people when things happen that they don’t like, even if Liam secretly agrees that Will deserved it. And then he forgot his lunch at home, and normally he’d meet Louis and they’d lunch together, but he doesn’t want Louis to offer some of his lunch, so he tells him he has a meeting instead and he already ate. It makes Louis look at him again with that frowny, considering sort of face before he smiles and tells Liam not to worry about it.

And by the time he’s seen all of his kids but Peter off home and gotten his classroom cleaned up, it’s nearly four, and Louis will be waiting, but he can’t leave until Peter’s safe with his mum, so he texts Louis to go ahead and he’ll catch the bus. It ends up being Peter’s nan, actually, because his mum had to pick up another shift at work, and she hadn’t realised his cousin wasn’t getting him, and she’s so awfully sorry to be so late, she just didn’t  _ realise, _ you see -

Liam politely assures her it’s no trouble and sees them to the door, closing it and sagging heavily onto it. He should go home, but after today - he just. He doesn’t think he can take Eric’s comments and the way he looks at Liam - always perfectly friendly, but it just. It makes him feel like he’s not got any clothes on and someone’s left him in the middle of town square.

He swallows, hard. Straightens his shoulders. His phone vibrates in his hand, and he glances down. It’s from Nick, to him and Harry, asking if they’re interested in coming to Collette’s art thing next week, and Liam’s heart almost jumps with relief. Of course, Nick! He’s an idiot to not have thought before; Nick will let him stay over for a couple days until Eric leaves, and he won’t have to deal with Eric, and he’ll be safe with Nick, so no one at home will worry. He texts Nick, just quickly, to make sure it’s all right, and Nick pings back a “sure thing, lad!” and seven or eight emojis that don’t make any sense. Liam smiles down at his phone, shaking his head, and then texts Louis that he’s going to Nick’s to see a film and might just stay the night if it gets late.

Grimmy’s in good form, opening the door with a loud, “Liam Payne! Liam Randall Payne the fourth! Come in, come in. Mind your feet, Piggy’s been in the mud and I haven’t cleaned yet.”

“Thanks for having me,” Liam says, edging in and dropping to his knees to greet an extremely excited and still rather muddy Pig.

“Anytime. Well, not when I’m at work. Or up in Manchester, I suppose, although if you needed to get in, obviously you could -” Nick makes claws out of his hands and growls half-heartedly.

Liam chuckles a little, his shoulders relaxing just a little. He’d forgotten how nice it was to just be around people like this.

“Fancy a takeaway? I was just going to order a pizza and forget being healthy, but I suppose with all your -” Nick gestures carelessly. “- you’ll want something with a bit more green stuff.”

Liam doesn’t flinch, but it’s a close thing. “Pizza’s good,” he says, just a touch too forcefully. “I’m not - I’m thinking of cutting back on the exercise, actually.”

“Really? All right, then, pizza it is.” Grimmy slants him a look, a little confused, and goes to put in the order.

Liam settles on the couch, Pig losing no time jumping up and making herself comfortable in his lap. She’s panting happily when Nick sticks his head back in the room, calls, “Liam, darling, would you prefer sausage or ham?”

Liam freezes, any tension that had disappeared coming right back. He shakes his head at himself, answering as normally as he can, “Either’s fine, thanks.”

Grimmy nods and disappears again, padding in a second later with a satisfied sigh. “Fifteen minutes, the bloke said. Feel free to change the channel if you like. Know Eastenders isn’t everyone’s cuppa.”

Liam shrugs a little, keeping his head turned to look at Pig so he won’t have to look at Nick. “Eastenders ‘s fine.”

“Right-o,” Nick says cheerfully. They sit and watch Martin and Stacey make idiots of themselves in silence for a while, and then he says, “Liam, you don’t have to - just me bein’ a professional nosy bugger again, but is everything alright?”

Liam's hand trembles minutely as he picks up the remote, turns the volume up a couple tics. "I'm great, yeah," he says automatically. "Really - good, yeah. Good. Fine."

"You don't look it," Nick says, looking troubled and moving a little closer. "Or sound it, bein' honest."

Liam tries not to lean away, reminds himself that he likes Nick, that he trusts Nick. "'m a bit tired, maybe," he offers, because - that's safe, right? People act oddly when they're tired, right? "Haven't been sleeping all that well, to be honest."   
  
“Ah, babe," says Nick. "How come?" He lifts an arm across the back of the couch behind Liam, and before he can stop himself, he's jerked away. Tries to cover it by getting up all the way, dislodging Pig gently over to the other cushion and moving over to the DVDs. "Think I might fancy a film instead of telly, what d'you reckon?" he asks, laughing uncomfortably.

Nick purses his lips, eyes still on Liam. He says, gentle, ”Is there a reason you're over here? It’s great, obviously, love having you, just - usually you don’t come by yourself." 

"Just - was feeling a bit. Crowded, like. Not the lads, they're all great, obviously. Just." Liam hesitates, deciding how much he can say. "Louis' got an old mate staying over."   
  
"Ahh yeah, always little weird havin' someone else stay in your house," says Nick. "Especially if you don't get along, then it's a nightmare. Used to have a roommate and her boyfriend was a terror, we rowed so much."

Liam laughs, the sound a little more bitter than he’d planned. "Wish it was rowing, to be honest."   
  
Nick sits up a little more, looking interested and sympathetic. "Yeah, what is it, then? Can tell me, honest, I've had the  _ worst  _ houseguest experiences. One time my cousin's best friend broke a window in my kitchen and then tried to hide the pieces around the house so we wouldn't know."   
  
"Did it work?" Liam asks, sounding more interested than the story probably warrants. But anything to get the focus off of this, off of him.   
  
"Of course not. Got my finger on the piece she'd hidden in the china cabinet. Bloody worst hider ever. Only found the one behind the loo a month later." Nick pauses, adds softly, "So what's your story, Liam? What's goin’ on?"   
  
"Is hider an actual word?" Liam asks, feeling a little desperate. "I mean, I'm not Zayn or anything, but it doesn't sound quite -"   
  
"Has someone hurt you?" Nick interrupts, eyebrows drawn sharply together.

Liam hesitates. "No!" he says after a second. "I mean - no, not like. Proper hurt, I mean. Not like it used to be or - or the things that happened back before - no."  
  
Nick frowns as he asks, "But there’s something?"  
  
Liam shrugs, fiddling with a DVD case. "I - I'm sure he means to be nice, they're like. Compliments? They just don't - don't feel nice, like the boys or yours? But he's Lou's mate, yeah? I don't want to - make a fuss over something he probably doesn't mean to be doing."  
  
Nick takes this in, looking like he’s actually thinking seriously about what Liam’s said. "But they make you - like, uncomfortable? The things he says?"  
  
"I'm sure he means well," Liam says, not sounding at all sure, even to his own ears, "but they're just all sort of. Um." He doesn't really know how to put this. He bites at his lip, lowers his voice even though it's just the two of them and Pig's fast asleep. "Sexual? I guess?"  
  
Nick looks actually worried. "Has he - has he tried to talk you into anything, Liam? Done anything you didn't want him to?"  
  
Liam feels all hot and squirmy. He hadn't meant to get Eric in trouble! But Nick wouldn't stop asking! In for a penny and all that, he guesses, so - "Um. just. lately. he keeps sitting kind of close? Putting his hand on my knee, things like that. I guess because he sees the others do it he figures it's okay, but." Liam meets Nick's eyes finally, looking agonized. "It's not, Grim, I don't like it. He looks at me all wrong, I don't like it."  
  
Nick looks aghast, sitting for a minute, almost like he’s taking it in before he starts, "D’you want a hug or would you rather not?"  
  
"Please," Liam gets out, face working as he tries not to cry. He feels like every hug he's had lately has been - tainted almost, by Eric standing there looking, watching.  
  
Nick opens his arms and Liam nearly topples into him, burying his face in Nick's shoulder. Two or three hot tears escape his tight-shut eyes - it's such a relief to have _told_ someone, even.  
  
"Oh, darling," Nick breathes, rubbing Liam's back. "All good here," he promises, lightly. "Just me and Pig."  
  
"Love Pig," Liam manages, "she's a good dog, isn't she?" He feels like he's grasping at something else to talk about, but. He does love Pig, so.  
  
"The best," agrees Nick, and hums, "can cry if you need to. Got, like, hours; just get it out of your system if you like." And then he carries on like he didn't stop, "She's the best dog ever. Awful at fetch, though. We were having a go at it the other day in the park and she was horrendous."  
  
Liam puts his head down on Nick's shoulder again and just listens to Nick go on about Pig and whatever else. He - he does cry, a bit more, leaking out single hot tears rather than the huge, gasping sobs. He ends up snuggled down almost on top of Nick, who just keeps rubbing his back and chatting away.  
  
Eventually, when Liam has been breathing deeper for a little bit, Nick says, "So. As happy as I would be to have you forever," he assures Liam, "I'm sure you want to go back home at some point. I think we need an action plan."  
  
Liam bites his lip. "Of course, yeah, but also. Maybe I could just. Stay here? Until Eric leaves? If it's not too much bother?" He just dreads - walking back into that.  
  
"You're welcome to if that's what feels best," Nick tells him, honestly, "but I feel like your pack might worry. And..." He hesitates, sounding a little unsure, before he goes again firmly, "I think Louis would want to know what's been going on?"  
  
Liam looks uncomprehending. "But Eric's his old mate."  
  
Nick sighs, sounding sad. "Yeah, Liam, and you're his pack."  
  
Liam doesn't reply to that, just keeps worrying at his lip. He just feels so stressed and anxious, like. Would rather just avoid it and stay at Nick's until it goes away rather than have to do any - confronting. Or telling Louis about anything.

Nick’s watching him, careful. "It's not okay," he tells Liam, quietly. "What he's doing - if he doesn't have your permission, it doesn't have to be okay."  
  
"But he's a - I don't want to be rude?" Liam sounds like he's asking for confirmation, for Nick to tell him that of course he needs to be polite and put up with it, because Eric is a guest and that's what you do even if it's inconvenient or hard for you.  
  
"He was fucking rude first," says Nick, gentle considering he's swearing. "You let him share your space and this is how he treats you?"  
  
"I - I guess," Liam says hesitantly. He hadn’t really - thought of it like that. "I don't want to bother Louis, though, I mean. He and Eric have been friends for years."  
  
"Louis's feelings about it aren't your job," Nick assures him. "He just ought to know what's going on in his house. He can then feel about it however he likes, and it's not your fault."  
  
Liam ducks his head, goes quiet for a long moment. "Hey, Nick?"  
  
"Mm?" Nick ducks his own head just a little, to get a glimpse of Liam's face.  
  
Liam flicks a glance up at him, lips almost trembling before he firms them. "I - just. Thanks. For taking and - letting me stay and - have a proper cry all over you." He feels so nice and warm and cared for, in a way he hasn't for a few long weeks  
  
"You're always welcome, Liam," Nick tells him softly. "Always, okay? Any time you need somewhere safe."  
  
Liam flings his arms around Nick's neck again, sniffling a couple times before pulling back and kissing Nick quickly on the cheek, like he does with Niall or Harry  
  
Nick holds him tight and smiles at the kiss, grin a little toothy. "You never have to let anyone do something you're not okay with," Nick affirms him. "Not for appearances or for the sake of manners or 'cause they’re a friend. Okay? I feel like you should've had this talk before now."  
  
"Think Zayn or Louis tried," Liam admits, a little shamefaced, "but it was just after I'd come and I didn't - I don't think I understood what they meant, really. And I was pretty embarrassed by everything, back then. Probably ran off, to be honest."  
  
Nick nods, looking understanding. "Okay. Well. To save them having to do it again: someone shouldn't get to make you uncomfortable because you don't feel like it's okay to say no. It's always okay to say no, and it's okay to seek someone else out to help you if they won't listen to your 'no'. Okay?" He gets eye contact, waiting for agreement.  
  
"Okay," Liam whispers. He still feels. Anxious about going back but. It feels good to have someone assuring him that he wasn't wrong to feel weird about the things Eric said and did.  
  
"Okay," Nick nods again. "Good. D’you still want to watch that film, or shall we just call it a night?"  
  
"Film, please." Liam reaches down to pet Pig's silky ears.  
  
"Excellent call," says Nick. "Movie, bit of a cuddle if you like. Not really ready for bed, anyway."  
  
"Can we watch Toy Story?" Liam asks, feeling a little shy about asking. It’s sort of a little kid choice.  
  
Nick shoots him an fondly amused look, like Harry will sometimes. "A classic! Sure, why not. Think Harry left a copy here, actually."

They put the disc in and Liam cuddles between Nick and Pig, feeling much more settled than he had an hour ago. Tomorrow’ll take care of itself.

He goes home after work the next day, Nick’s parting words from that morning still in his ears - “Everyone has the right to say no, Liam, and if they don’t listen, you get help and force them to listen.”

It’s a bit - easier said than done, but he doesn’t force himself to reply when Eric greets him as he walks in, looking like he hasn’t moved off the couch in the past 72 hours. Just walks by, up to his room to change. Dinner’s much nicer than it’s been for a while - Zayn’s out of town on a job, but the rest of them are there, and Eric takes his into the living room to watch a rugby match, so it’s just them around the table. Afterwards, Harry and Niall are on clean-up, and Louis sits on the counter, cheerfully flicking bits of napkin at them. Liam shakes his head at them, fond, and heads up to his room. He’s got the fourth Narnia book downloaded to his phone, and he’s eager to start it. 

“Liam!” Eric calls as he passes through, “Come watch the match with me, mate, it’s bloody good.”

Liam hesitates. “No, I’m - think I might just go up to my room, read for a bit, thanks.”

Eric scoffs. “C’mon, that’s not very social, is it? Just for ten or fifteen minutes, now then you can go be boring if you like.”

Reluctantly, Liam edges in, sits on the opposite end of the couch. Eric immediately moves over until he’s right next to him, puts his hand on Liam's knee, all casual. Makes one of his comments about Liam's arms, how easily he could pin someone down, if you know what I mean, and winks and takes another drink of his beer. Liam’s starting to get that panicky feeling, cold in the pit of his stomach.  
  
He takes a deep breath, and another. Gets out, "Stop." It comes out a little weaker than he’d like, but he means it with every fiber of his being.  
  
Eric pauses, but he lets out an easy laugh. "Just tryin' to pay you a compliment, lad, no need to get all shirty over it." He slings an arm over Liam's shoulders.  
  
"I want you to stop," Liam says, a little more insistent this time, going tense under Eric's touch and squeezing his eyes shut.  
  
"Can't you take a bloody compliment, honestly Liam, I'm just being friendly," Eric huffs. He doesn't move his arm.  
  
Liam's starting to feel more panicked now. He’s been shoving all this down for ages and now it's starting to bubble to the surface, all this swallowed discomfort and upset.”Please, just stop for a bit," he says a little more desperately.

"What's going on here, then?" Louis asks, appearing in the doorway. His voice isn’t - not quite angry but edging into upset. He’s frowning as he takes in Eric's arm and Liam almost - cringing away from it and the way Eric is leaning into Liam's space.  
  
Liam looks up sharply, a mix of worried and hopeful and guilty. "I -" he starts. But he can still feel Eric's arm on him and the words peter out.

Eric throws Louis a lazy sort of smile. "Just chilling with Liam. Cute boy, isn't he?"  
  
Liam flinches, ducks his head down again. Eric’s never been. That blatant before. But there’s the remnants of a six pack of beer and he's not thinking as clearly as he might. Liam doesn’t know what to say or do beyond yelling outright for help, which he’s not going to do, so he just sits silently, hands clasped tightly in his lap.  
  
Louis' lips tighten. "Liam, why don't you come over here." And there's the barest hint of alpha in his tone, which he almost never uses on any of them. But he's gone past starting to be mad and he's watching the way Eric is looking at Liam and running the interactions of the past three weeks through a different filter and he does _not_ like the answer he's coming up with.  
  
Liam stands and comes over, before he can really think about it, before it really processes, because that's what the alpha in Louis’ tone does. Once he's there he just. Stands and looks at his feet. Doesn't want his face to show anything.  
  
Louis puts an arm around Liam's neck, tugs him in close. Sort of a "see, mine, not yours" kind of gesture. Looks Eric up and down. "I think you'd better find somewhere else to stay, mate," he says coldly.

Eric's eyes go wide for a second before he laughs. "Oh, come on, mate, I was only joking. Liam knows I was just having a laugh, right Liam?"  
  
Liam's heart is pounding in his ears and he goes with Louis's touch, buries into it even though he tries to hold back. Can't help it. He doesn’t. He doesn't know what to _do._  
  
"Liam?" Louis asks, not breaking his eye contact with Eric.  
  
"I- ...... yeah," says Liam. And then - "No. No, wait." He's shaking, and he knows Louis can probably feel it. "It wasn't," Liam gets out.  
  
"Sure it was," Eric says, dismissive. "C'mon, Louis, we're old mates, yeah?"  
  
Liam wraps an arm around Louis's waist and. Clings a bit.  
  
"Liam," Louis whispers, "whatever it is, you can say it. I love you so much, I'm sorry I didn't notice, I'm so sorry, you can say it, I promise."  
  
Liam breathes shakily and says, "He's been - I'm not okay with it, I want him to go." And it’s not all of it, but it's something.  
  
Louis nods once, firmly. "Eric, get out."

Eric's mouth really does fall open then. "What - just leave?"

"Exactly. Out. Now. I want you out of my house and my sight in six minutes."

"Hang on, that's not -"

"Five minutes and forty-five seconds."  
  
Liam clings tighter. Doesn't budge as this happens.  
  
Louis holds Eric’s gaze, lets a hint of a growl come through. "Out."  
  
Liam flinches but - closer to Louis? The growl is protective and safe, it’s not towards _him_.  
  
Eric stands, still looking flummoxed, but he disappears into the downstairs guest room, comes out a moment later with a hastily packed bag. "Thanks for this, you sodding bitch,” he spits at Liam as he goes. "I'm not going to forget this, Tomlinson."

"Have a great life being a complete and total arse, Eric!" Louis calls after him cheerfully.  
  
Liam lets out a sharp breath like he was hit, keeps his eyes shut and his face buried in Louis's side until he hears the door slam closed.  
  
Louis bundles Liam onto the sofa at once, tugging him down with him. "Liam, I'm so - I'm so sorry, love, I'm so sorry, this never should have - I feel like a complete arse meself, can you ever - I should have noticed, Louis, you _idiot_.” He pauses for breath, then, "is this - is this okay, I'm sorry, I didn't ask, shit - sorry again."  
  
Liam doesn't say anything until a weak, "s fine," about Louis hugging him. He feels - relieved but also just upset and miserable and hurt.  
  
"He didn't -" Louis swallows hard, dreading to even contemplate the thought that something more might have happened on his watch, without Liam telling him. "He didn't - did he do anything, Liam? Anything more inappropriate that I need to know about so I can hunt him down and rip out his throat?"  
  
"Nothing more than - than what you saw," Liam says, with some difficulty, "but - it happened a lot."  
  
Louis' eyes close tight with pain. "I'm so sorry, Liam. This is all my fault, in more ways than one. Shit, I - no wonder you were out so much. Love, why didn't you tell me? I would have kicked him out much sooner."  
  
"I didn't know how!" Liam says, shoving his hands into his pockets to keep them from shaking. "I wasn't even sure it was okay to be upset about it until Nick told me, I - and you've been friends for so long and he didn't _hurt_ me."  
  
Louis feels like he's been punched in the gut. How had he - how had he failed Liam this badly.

"Oh, Liam," he breathes, "love, I - no, of course it's okay to be upset about! Your feelings are important and valid, always, especially to me. Shit, Liam, you're my _pack_ , yeah? I love you so much; you're always always going to come first, no matter how long I've known someone.” He pauses, goes on gently. "And if he made you uncomfortable, he was hurting you. If he wasn't listening when you said no, he was hurting you."  
  
"He kept - he kept saying he was being nice," Liam says, voice trembling a little.  
  
"He wasn't," Louis says promptly and firmly. "If it was making you uncomfortable, he wasn't, I promise, Liam. Next time someone says that and you don't like what they're doing or how they're doing it, you punch them right where it'll do the most damage, with my blessing."  
  
Liam pulls his knees up and rests his head on them. "I think I'm going to cry," he says, just. Giving Louis a heads up. "I'm - I'm okay, but."  
  
"Whatever you want, whatever you need, Liam, I promise, I'm so sorry I wasn't - d'you want a cuddle or some space?"  
  
"Could you stay?" Liam says, voice getting thicker. "Not for a - I don’t think - a cuddle, just. Need you here."  
  
"'Course, always." Louis holds out a hand in case Liam wants to hold it, leaves it in the middle between their bodies.   
  
Liam reaches out blind and clutches it, and then just. Cries, shoulders shaking, holding Louis's hand a little too tight.  
  
Louis holds on tight back, leaning in sometimes to kiss the hand he's holding. He's feeling pretty sick himself that none of them noticed Liam was dealing with all this, all by himself.  
  
"You could have called Zayn," Louis says presently, very gently, "if you were worried about me and not wanting to hurt my relationship with Eric, you could've called him, you know that, right?"  
  
"I tried to talk to him about it," Liam admits, "but I couldn't. I - I felt all. I dunno, embarrassed?"  
  
"Oh, Leemo," Louis says softly, borrowing Zayn's pet name. "I - feel a bit like a broken record, but I'm so sorry. Was it - something I said? That made you feel you couldn't talk about this openly?"  
  
Liam shakes his head and then says, "I just - I don't know, Louis, I was so - confused."  
He adds weakly, "It was all blurry."  
  
Louis hums, brows still creased in a worried frown, but he says, "If anything - God forbid - like this ever happens again, or anyone ever makes you feel uncomfortable, you know it's okay to say no, right? And to come and get one of us or call for help if they won't listen?"  
  
Liam finally flushes. "I, um. yeah. Nick - Nick told me that, too."  
  
Louis wants to roll his eyes or cry or tug at his hair. Grimmy knew about this and he didn't? "Nick knew?" he manages in a mostly normal voice.  
  
"I - yeah, when I went to stay with him? Yesterday? I-" Liam doesn't want to make Louis feel worse so he doesn't detail the whole story. "- we talked about it."  
  
"Oh," Louis says, sort of quiet. Nick bloody Grimshaw knew, noticed something was off with Liam, and Louis hadn't. "Well! That's good then, glad Grimmy was good for something."  
  
Liam doesn't give the normal slightly scandalised delighted laugh he gives when Louis is bantery-type mean about Nick. Says, "He told me that I should tell you. He - what he said would happen is right. He knew you'd - you'd look out for me." He adds shakily, "I was going to tell you, Lou, really, it just didn't feel like the right time. Thought maybe I could wait for him to leave."  
  
"Oh, love," Louis says softly. His heart is breaking for Liam right now, for Liam of a week ago, two weeks ago, three. "Really am a proper broken record but. I really am. So sorry."  
  
Liam leans over onto Louis, finally. Rests his head on Louis's shoulder. "Don't tell the others, yet?" he asks, soft. "Like - Zayn is okay but - Harry and Niall. Yet," he reiterates.  
  
"They're going to wonder why Eric just slammed the front door hard enough to shake the whole bloody house," Louis points out mildly, one hand coming up to stroke Liam's hair. Liam hesitates just for a second before relaxing into the touch, because. It feels good. Like it's meant to.

“I know,” Liam says, “But can we just - just for a while.”

Louis turns his head enough to press a kiss to Liam’s temple. “Yeah, love,” he says, soft. “‘Course. Anything you want.”

“Just this,” Liam says, fingers tightening on Louis’ arm. “This is - I just want this.”   
  


**Author's Note:**

> an oc repeatedly makes sexually charged comments about Liam's body and attempts to get close physically; however Liam stops him before anything goes too far and nothing farther happens. Most of the fic is Liam working through it being okay to say no to people and how to get backup for when saying no by yourself is too hard.


End file.
